Category Archives: Misc

20 Random Facts About Me

Narcissistic? Well, sue me! I was once asked to describe myself in one word and what I could come up with is introvert. Quite cliché, don’t you think? Well, I had to come up with random facts about myself to give me options.

random facts

  1. I’m a sucker for good grammar and punctuations, especially when reading. I can’t stand those who use ‘am’ instead of ‘I’m’; ‘loose’ instead of ‘lose’, ‘your’ instead of ‘you’re’ or ‘their’ instead of ‘there’. I might just punch you in the throat.
  2. I used to think the concept of celebrity crush is nonsense but I have 2 of those now 🙈. They’re Janelle Monae and Sanaa Lathan. *side-eyes Milla Jovovich* Continue reading
Advertisements

Of Forensics & Fighting Boko Haram.

The Boko Haram insurgency in the North eastern part of the country can be described as a crime against humanity because the sect’s activities carry the features of such and also carry genocidal tendencies. The sect’s ideology which is to establish an Islamic caliphate is such that all opposition to it is met with brutal violence. The sect’s mode of achieving this has been assassinations, bombings, systematic wiping out of people of other beliefs and recruitment of child soldiers.

image
In the light of this, forensic science can be of great significance in stopping this sect.

Continue reading

Jollof Rice Life.

Okay, I really shouldn’t be doing this. Because, Ramadan. But this darling in front of me won’t let a brother be great. But, whatever…

Yup! I’m talking ’bout the mentor of foods. A food all foods aspire to be like. Jollof Rice. Those two words really is life. A food for all seasons.

Continue reading

CRUSHER-CRUSHEE

The bed creaked under his weight. Sleep has eluded him. A generator hummed in the distance. He turned around on his bed like an okoto while the event of the past day resonates in his head. Just when he had thought it wise to make his intention known to his crush, he had found himself in that dreaded zone. Though that was what his heart desired, he had approached Itunu after barrages of prodding from his buddies Heartbroken & dejected, he had hoped to find solace in the warmth of his bed but it obviously had other plans.

image

Me. Basically.

Her expression and words keep playing in his head- with a coy smile planted on her fresh face, which highlighted her dimples, while her evenly set dentition flashed in his expectant face, she had said, ‘Ermm, you know.. we really should just remain as friends’. He had then nodded his head in (dis)agreement while a stifled giggled escaped from his lips.
Introverted & shy- a bad combo already, some would say,his shot at forging a relationship just met a stonewall. Now, he’s going to return to his companion, solitude.

___________________________________________________

Even though Ezinne had taken her time to prepare the succulent yam and egg sauce, the food was still tasteless for Itunu whose stomach had not hosted any food for the past 7 hours. She keeps ruminating on the event of the past few hours.

image

Would anyone reject this, really?

So, he finally opened up. But he has to work for it. It won’t be nice if she simply nodded in agreement to his request. ‘Dewale is everything she wishes for in a male. And more. Unlike others who were filled with youthful exuberance-inspired ennui, he is focused & result-oriented.
But, as her friends usually say, what makes a man value a lady more is if he exerts energy in getting her approval.  By so doing, she’ll be appreciated by him. The question that now bothers her mind is, will ‘Dewale come back for her?

image

...in solitude

Real Men’s Food

I don’t know if it’s weird but i plan to walk into a restaurant one of these days and look directly into the attendant’s eye and order for just something- DODO. OK, i love dodo. The love i have for dodo is more than what a mere mortal can fathom because even me sef no understand am.

Wow... Just wow...

Wow… Just wow…

All i know is that the love I’ve got for it is much more than the crush i had for this geh in secondary school… OK, scratch that…! Ask this idiot for my secondary school crush. Dodo is the best thing to have happened since man thought of putting something into his mouth. Like fellow lovers of dodo have confessed, ‘Shii so good, they named it twice. Do-do’. And this and this, this food is meant for those who value the best of things. I’m quite certain that the person who first prepared dodo is in the best part of heaven. The fellow should be high up there with Einstein and Galileo, in regards to saving the human race. To be honest, the sight of dodo is capable of making me reach orgas

Ain't this worth killing for?

Ain’t this worth killing for?

ok, nvm :p and the sound of its sizzle is one of the best sounds in the universe, only second to eardrum piercing silence of the moonless night. In fact, there is a silent-yet-ferocious rivalry between this foolish boy & I over who loves this food, only befitting for kings, more. The good news is that i’m winning, though he wouldn’t agree with me. I know that no matter the gravity of his offence to me, it will be settled over a plate of this paradise’s food, and vice versa. A wise man once said that dodo is the what we are to eat when we get to heaven. Ain’t that enough motivation?

Oh well!

Oh well!

Lest i forget, when i become rich, y’all that plan to kidnap me should include dodo in my diet- then, my ransom would be hefty. Did i just say that? Ok, pretend as if you did not see that 😀 . Dodo is heavenly. Dodo is great. Dodo is golden. Dodo is refreshing. Dodo is a hunger-buster. Dodo is __________ *fill in the word*

The Ibeji Panegyrics

The Ibeji Panegyrics

The Yoruba tribe has the highest rate of twin
births in the world. Igbo-Ora, a little town in Oyo state, has been nicknamed Twin capital of the World because of its unusually high rate of twins
that is put as high as 158 twins per 1000 births. In a video on YouTube presented by Titi (a white lady who speaks Yoruba), and which was centred on twin births in Igbo-Ora, one of the locals boasted that every family in the town has at least one twin! The following is the oriki for all we twins in the world. Enjoy!

Ejire oyila winiwini loju orogun,
ejiworo loju iya re
Mba bejire mbayo,
O be kese be kasa,
ofese me jejeji be sile alakisa
o so alakisa di onigbaso,
okan ni mba bi mba yo,
sugbon meji lowole tomiwa,
Gbajumo omo ti ngba ikunle iya,
ti ngba idobale lowo baba to bi won lomo
Ejire ara isokun, edunjobi omo edun tin sere ori igi
Epo nbe, ewa nbe, aya mi oja lati bi ibeji
Taiyelolu ma yo se se,
Akehinde gbegbon
mayo se se
Ejire oyila, ema yo se se, nbabi edunjobi
mba yo pe mobi oba omo.
Edumare bawa da awon Ibeji wa si.
Amin Ase!

Kindly leave ur comments :)!

Weather For Two… or Tea

Weather For Two... or Tea

The time is 8:16am but the weather says 7:19pm. The earth is about to receive a very soothing visitor. Everyone has been expecting this visitor to save us from the horrors of the heat of the past few weeks. IT IS ABOUT TO RAIN! The weather is so tense that you feel it in your soul. Women hurry to collect their clothes from the line- dry or otherwise. You sit here, on the edge of your ruffled bed, wondering about the unknown.
Then the rain begins. It is so heavy that you wonder if it had won a bet against the sun and the sun was cuddled up somewhere mourning its loss. It’s been 40 minutes and you wonder if the rain goes back for reinforcement every 40 seconds. There seems no end in sight! You have now moved to the verandah, sitting alone on the brown KGM plastic chair savouring the fresh air accompanying the rain. The plants heave a sigh of relief. The lizards and ants must now be cuddled up somewhere and the mosquitoes must be resting now, after the night’s battle.
Several thoughts crowd your mind. This seems a perfect weather for two or tea or even, both. With Yanni’s Nightingale playing in the background, the occasional thunder serving as bass to the soft-playing Nightingale and the wind carressing your body, your system reacts to the change in temperature. You think this is an awesome time for you to be in bed snuggled up to your better half; inhaling his/her breathe and pleasant smell and feeling the presence of no third party. Then, you wonder what the consequences will be after the rain had long gone. You think of the result of your action in the long run & your (in)ability to deal with it. Is this really a weather for 2? Of course, it is, but with it comes consequences & responsibilities. So you’d rather settle for the latter- light the gas cooker, boil some water and make a very hot tea. This has no consequences except that you’ll find yourself sound asleep, under your floral blanket, with no 2nd or 3rd party involved!